home, sweet, home♥

After a long day of school, I walk across the dirt tracked sidewalk, gazing at the trees, ducks, horses, and dogs that pass me by. I see laughter on faces and inside jokes being shared as the stress of classes, homework, and studying start to melt away like ice in the heat of the summer day. I wait on the wood bench for my mom to pick me up, looking at the oak trees, the butterflies, and the flowers, thinking to myself, what if I never grew up this way?

I've always grown up with a feeling of familiarity in my home. Every morning I get up, find something to wear, take curlers out of my hair, eat breakfast, pray, and I'm out the door. I make it a point right when I get to school to visit my locker and get my required materials, and then I hang out with my best friends until school starts. After school we work on homework and go to rehearsals. My whole life has become a routine. I don't think it's a big problem, but I like to imagine what would happen if I didn't wake up living this way.

I couldn't imagine waking up on a dirt floor at the beginning of sun rise, tending to my younger brothers and sisters. I couldn't imagine having to go out and try to find food for my family, otherwise, we wouldn't eat that day. I couldn't imagine working from sun rise to the night, endlessly working, trying to make money. I couldn't imagine having torn, old, dirty clothes. I couldn't imagine looking up and seeing the dirt slowly falling down from the dirt made roof. I couldn't imagine being a child in the slums of Kenya, Africa.

Lately in my quiet times, God has shown me that it is His life, and not my own. I've been acting so selfish lately, only looking out for myself, when I should be caring to the needs of others. While I was worrying whether or not I could hit the ball in PE (I couldn't) someone else out there was worrying about insecurity, and could have been suicidal that day. But I didn't help.

I want to reach a world in need. To feed the ones in need, both physically and spiritually. To serve God at my feet. This life isn't mine, it belongs to God. He's the only reason I live, so shouldn't He be the only motivation I have to live? I need to start from the beginning again. Rediscover who I really am. Ask God to revive the spirit of servant-hood within me. And ultimately, make the most out of my high school career not by wearing cute outfits and having the most friends, but instead, serving the least of these and giving those who are hopeless a second chance of grace. I was BORN for this.

Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."